Soldier Suicides

Soldier suicides spike
There is a huge problem in our system. Even when I needed 'someone' to talk to while my husband was deployed I did not feel comfortable seeking mental health treatment. I was afraid that there would be no real confidentiality. I did finally go through Military One Source. I did not however express all my true feelings. All I could think is "What if I say something that goes back to my husbands unit?"

If I felt that way, what must the actual soldier feel? It's no wonder they don't seek the help they may need. There are flags, and stigmas and repercussions. Even if it's said there are none. It's there. It might not be visible, but it's there.

"According to the report, from 2005 to 2009 more than 1100 members of the US Armed Forces took their own lives — an average of 1 suicide every 36 hours during the 5-year period. "In that same period suicide rates among Marines and Soldiers sharply increased; the rate in the Army more than doubled," the report notes."

That report only addresses suicide. It does not address the increase in violence and crimes committed by soldiers. There has to be more. 

Surrounded

After spending a year isolated from people then being thrust back into them I feel like I am suffocating.

I don't have problems with my husband, he's just under my feet all the time. I can't clean when he's resting because it will disturb him.

I got sick days after his return and have been surrounded by doctors and nurses and lab techs. We had an old roommate move back in to help out with the house. Oh yes, because my husband's leg broke the day after returning from leave. I have never had a chance to recover because I've had to jump into taking care of him too.

My 25 year old son will be here in 2 months to live for at least a year. There is nothing where he is at and he wants a new start in life. I hope he can find it here. My once empty 4 bedroom house is quickly filling up. If there is not one person demanding my attention there are three or four or five. Keep adding in extended familial problems that I'm expected to deal with from a thousand miles away and the numbers keep getting higher.

I need some peace. Some solitude. Some time away from the news or the constant facebook bickering over the proposed mosque or the Qur'an. There is no way to choose a winning side. The flooding, the fires, the earthquakes, tsunamis. The list goes on with disgruntled workers killing people at former job sites. I am sensitive and for whatever reason I take on the problems of everyone. No, I don't try to fix them. I just feel them.

For just a few days I don't want to feel. I don't want to be needed. I just want to be alone and not have any demands made on me. No expectations, no worries.

Dream worlds are nice huh?